Through the process of keeping up with mine, of course I get intrigued with others. What is it that we love about reading other people's lives? About their daily life and their fun times, hard times or sad times. Before you know it, you are a loyal follower and you get excited when you see they have updated. There are so many things you can gain from reading others blogs. Great recipes, fun kid crafts, fun sweepstakes to enter to win something cute, maybe an idea of how to deal with a difficult toddler or situation, fun fashion ideas or house decorating tips, products that you may not of known they even existed or how they work, the list goes on.
Sometimes, you can even touch a bit deeper and learn more important life lessons. Such as how much you take for granted, or maybe how much you maybe can be selfish. Perhaps a little jealousy of others, or maybe just being an unhappy person and taking it out on everyone else. Materialistic items aren't of importance, nor is the person that just cut you off in traffic, after all- maybe they were running late to be next to a sick loved one and didn't really even mean to cut you off. We don't know everyone else's stories, and are always so quick to jump to the negative side of it. Putting blame on others, not take responsibility for our own actions. Sometimes thru these blogs, you learn empathy, compassion, heartache, and great inspirations!
I have been reading for as long as I've been blogging. Occasionally I have time and find my way to other people's blogs- even more people I've never read about before. I become intrigued with some of their stories , especially ones that lay their hearts out. I become an avid loyal reader and I look forward to reading so many of them. However I seem to find so many of them that are so sad. Some that are dealing with real life painful hard lessons. Lessons I could never imagine. My heart aches for so many and they inspire me so much at the same time.
One stands out in particular. I can't even remember how I found it. I wish I could. It's been about a month now. The moment I started reading it I became basically obsessed. I couldn't stop reading. Her words cut me straight to the heart. It's called Rockstar Ronan. He is seriously one of the most beautiful boys ever, I only wish I found it earlier. I wish I was one extra prayer each night for Ronan. Ronan was an almost 4 year that passed away from stage IV Neuroblastoma in May 2011. Right after I found it, Taylor Swift debuted her new song, "Ronan" how amazing. She wrote it for him, his memory, for awareness. That in itself is pretty amazing. What timing. I cried, I cried like I never thought I would. It was odd. I don't even know this little boy, however I feel as if I do! The feeling is unreal. Ronans mother is nothing short of amazing and expresses her every raw feeling, emotion, harshness, vulnerability that she has on this blog. She has documented their every step of Ronan's battle since it started in Aug 2010. Ronan was 3 at the time of being diagnosed and had a hard fight ahead of him, never once did they question the outcome as they knew they had an amazing little fireball that was going to beat it. He was feisty and a natural fighter. I skipped around and read different parts as I was hoping to take a break from the sheer painful words I was reading. But it was all so beautiful and moving - as horrible as that sounds. Her words put you in that place- in her shoes, it is like you are feeling everything she is. She doesn't sugar coat, she puts it out there just as it is, not many do that. It is overwhelming the amount of love, sadness and heartache you will feel.
It took me awhile to read it as I could only take so much at a time. Then in my mind I would feel horrible that I could take a break from the pain, but she couldn't. But it didn't help- I think about Ronan and his amazing mom all the time! I can't get him or his horrifying journey off my mind. He has touched me like something I have never experienced before. Maya, his mama is doing amazing things and on an awesome path trying to find a cure for childhood cancer. She is devoted and driven.
Ive been so ignorant!! I never knew anything about childhood cancer before. Not one thing. Obviously I know what cancer is- but it was a shallow feeling. I do believe me having a child of my own has changed my emotions and my feelings, as it should. I could not imagine going thru what she went thru with my very own little feisty boy. It's heart wrenching.
Where have I been when all these children are fighting for their lives but had no idea what is going on?! Where were you?!
I think this is such a horrifying experience for any child or parent. That statistics alone moved me. Maybe you will learn something today.
* Every day 46 children are diagnosed with cancer. 7 of them will die today
*Childhood Cancer is the number one disease killer in children
*Pediatric cancer only receives 3.8% of all cancer research funding. Really?! Are you kidding me?! 3.8%!!!!! What?! Why?! I am fully compassionate for all cancers, they are all important, they are all hell. Childhood cancer just hits me harder. Something about a toddler/baby/young teen fighting for their life. That isn't right. Children are amazing and such a blessing. No parent should have to bury their child. It's not fair. Life isn't fair- I know. But this really isn't fair! They deserve to grow, thrive, learn, get in trouble, succeed, and everything else that comes with growing up.
*In the U.S. almost 3,000 children do not survive cancer each year
*Over the past 20 years, only TWO new cancer drug has been approved for pediatric use – Clofarabine (Clolar-Genzyme) in 2004 for ALL and Tenoposide (Vumar/VM-26-BMS) in 1990.
*September is Pediatric Cancer Awareness Month, which nationally goes unrecognized.
*The federal government recently cut the budget for Childhood Cancer Research.
*Currently there are between 30 – 40,000 children undergoing cancer treatment in the U.S
*The National Cancer Institute’s (NCI) federal budget for 2003 was $4.6 billion. Of that, breast cancer received 12%, prostate cancer received 7%, and all 12 major groups of pediatric cancers combined received less than 3%.
If that doesn't touch you, hurt you or effect you in one way shape or form, that is so sad. This is real. this is every day. This is someone's life. I for some reason - cannot let that be. I'm motivated. I'm touched, I'm inspired all while aching inside. I will be donating to this cause as often as I can. Especially directly the Ronan Thompson Foundation as that is their mission. They will be building a world class Neuroblastoma research and care center. I know they can do it. Even before Ronan passed away Maya expressed her compassion in changing the face of childhood cancer, how she will fight with all she has to change how messed up it is and has been! She will never stop fighting. I will help. I wish I knew why I feel so drawn to this- why it means so much to me. I have never felt so drawn to anything like this before. Ever. This is totally a new territory to me. It means something and now its my job to figure it out. There is a reason for this. For me finding this blog, falling in love with it, and thinking of Ronan and his story every single day. I need to find the reason. For the first time in my life, I have been so moved, so touched and felt a sense of peace. It's overwhelming. It's overwhelming to feel peace, yet be so scared to be without your own child, like Ronan's life, his gut wrenching story would repeat in your life.
Because of this - I love Bridger 1000 times more each day that passes. I didn't even think that was possible. I think he is so amazing and perfect! Even during his fits, I have SO much patience it is scary. I still snap every now and then, but rarely. It is easy to me now - to find a way to make my unhappy tantrum throwing 2 1/2 year smiling again and laughing. I have some kind of power. And I love it. I love making him laugh so hard, I love seeing his smile so bright and enormous. I love the gigantic hugs he gives me. How he caresses my hair or face. Even his roughness. It is all perfect. I don't want it any other way. This is my life that I wanted. I have tried to stop trying to have control over so many things. I am seriously sitting back, taking in each and every moment and smiling after each one. I have more patience with others. Ive never been quick to judge others, and now I'm even more less involved with that. I just want my world to be centered around my child. I want him to go everywhere with me. I hate that I have to leave him every day for 10 hours. Hate it.
Some other people may not have this same desire or compassion for this, and that is perfectly fine, but I want them to be aware, to know. to share. This can happen to anyone. and it does. If only everyone could relax, sit back and enjoy the ride more. the ride of life and happiness. It is so worth the ride. It is so worth the story.
This is real. I care. I ache. I'm committed. Now to find out exactly how or what......
www.rockstarronan.com
www.theronanthompsonfoundation.com
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