We have gotten some comments from many people, and more so lately. I am all about ideas, information, and anything that could possibly help me to be a better parent- but I also don't want to hear how bad is he every time I'm around someone. We understand he is a handful and hard to handle. It is a constant battle in our household. Sometimes we really are so exhausted from trying to discipline our child and all the other things that go on. It is mentally and emotionally draining. People that have head strong children really have a huge insight to this. They understand so much more! They provide valuable information ( as does everyone else) and a sincere "I understand, & it gets easier". I sometimes feel as other just don't get it. I feel like I shouldn't have to explain and defend non stop either. To each there own, right? I really don't want that to be the topic of conversation every time we talk.
Ryan and I are both very laid back, so that in itself is hard and a struggle for us, because we need to rethink and reprogram ourselves to be consistent and hold our ground. We love to try new things and try to throw out whatever doesn't seem to be working. The issue isn't just him- we fully understand it is us too! We are trying.
After hearing this over and over it becomes annoying and not so helpful anymore. A few weeks ago, after feeling extremely defeated- my daycare lady approached me and let me know that Bridger was being so naughty. He wasn't listening well and talking back. Imagine my disappointment and overwhelming feeling of defeat. I felt so horrible. My child does have behavior issues and Ryan and I are just wanting to fix it and let everyone else finally see how amazing he truly is.
After talking to someone that I really feel gets me and who I feel can give some good insight to parenting- I took my sisters advice and seeked a behavior therapist. It didnt take me too long as a lady I work with that is one of my friends, Mother-n-law- knew of someone. I called immediately and set up an appt for the next week. Also, these people office out of a church and all services are free!
Ryan and I went alone the first time and gave some back ground on everything that is going on. Details and alot of talking and discussing. She gave us some pointers that day and we had already tightened up on Bridger already- so that appt helped some more! I will elaborate more later on with what pointers she has given us.
I took Bridger myself tonight and he basically just played and she watched and played with him. Basically assessing him I guess. We go back next week again. He was such a good boy today. Just a few Nos and not listening. At the end he saw her piggy bank and it all fell down hill from there! Haha my sweet baby boy wanted that money.
I don't know how often we will have to go, but we are more than willing to do what we need to do to get Bridger where he needs to be. Better to do now at 3 and not 13. Although Ryan and I are so laid back we still require our child to behave well and have respect for others. To listen and abide by the rules that we place or rules that are wherever he may be. We understand he is 3 and tantrums are to be expected, but our issue goes beyond that.
I am not trying to complain, just express this time as what it is so I will remember. It is already so hard as it is dealing with such a defiant child, we embrace support and positive comments and ideas, methods that could help us. We really just want to wash out the negative comments and complaints. We aren't perfect and we never will be, we are trying so hard to do whatever we can. This huge step going to the behavior therapist makes us feel even more so that we are doing what we can and we will always try.
My baby is such a sweet sweet little man. But everything you do with him, you have to do it differently, there are special techniques, we are learning so we can teach him in the best way possible. Fingers crossed this helps us!!!! He is so so special and so amazing.